How the hell am I supposed to love this postpartum body?

How the hell am I supposed to love this postpartum body?
The complexity of body image. 





Messaging that supports embracing our postpartum bodies rather than “body back” is SO needed; however, there is still a mucky complexity that comes with it for the women that feel like they might want plastic surgery. They may feel that they “failed” at embracing their body along with a laundry list of other failures as a mother. And so continues the guilt/ shame cycle of motherhood.





I thought I would NEVER love my body and got really pissed at people that told me I should or that I would with more time.


But then I DID.

I found a deep love for my body....

 ...with time, education, getting strong AF, and helping others.

But I still didn’t want a protruding belly for the rest of my life.

The problem isn’t that women get tummy tucks and boob jobs after having babies.

It is that they rush into these surgeries because they have a great disdain and disgust for their bodies.

It is that they go into it without all the information about surgery or recovery, along with thinking they will look “perfect” afterwards.

As a result, I see heartbreaking surgery struggles from so many women. 

There is no one answer to this complex problem, but I have a few ideas that I would like to share with you. 

From a mentality standpoint:

Finding a mental health professional should be an important first addition to your team. 

Forcing yourself to sit in an uncomfortable place can make a huge difference in how you view your body. However, there are many women that have sat for years and are still miserable. So, seeking support to challenge your body and brain in new ways can become a focus/goal for you. 

Sharing your story, body, and truth with others can be very helpful in this process as well. Feeling like you are not alone while also helping to normalize the way postpartum bodies can look is so powerful.

From an informational standpoint:

Relying ONLY on your surgeon no matter how good he/she is might not yield the best results for your mind or body. Having a surgeon, physical therapist, and coach all as part of your team is key.  

Being relentless and interviewing multiple surgeons, even if you like the first one, is very important. You’ll learn something at each consultation. I promise.

Gathering facts in all the ways is imperative because you don’t know what you don’t know. And you don’t want to NOT know anything since it is YOUR body. Have a deep understanding of how the surgery will be done and why…. and keep asking questions. Go back again and again.

Learning about your postpartum body and getting a coach that knows how to train you with these considerations is a game changer. Get physically strong and be proud of what you body can do vs how it looks. Gaining strength like this takes time. Another reason not to rush into anything.

However in this current culture, we want the instant fix. And, surgery is so tempting in that way. But it just isn’t the instant fix that people think it is. Body image struggles and/or pain might not magically disappear post op. And, I am so upset seeing so many post surgery struggles with so many misguided women. 

I am working hard to create change in this surgery world. Thanks for being with me. 

Please share with someone that needs it today! 

DISCLAIMER: I realize most of these suggestions are coming from a place of privilege; however, if you are able to spend $10 -20,000 on surgery, then these tips are made for you!